It was hard to believe after a couple of months I was going back to Sunny LA, to the life I missed so much, my friends, my social life-but it was all only temporary-I had a return date for 6 weeks.
I desperately needed to get back, not just to deal with all my financial issues, start to earn some money but to revive myself.
The last couple of weeks had been so, so tough-there was a decline with mum and she was needing more and more help. I was emotionally and physically exhausted-I needed my friends, some normality and a break.
My taxi was coming early, I woke up exhausted but determined to not think too much and just go step by step. Of course it was pouring with rain outside, I went into mum's room and kissed her and told her I loved her and I was leaving now. Luckily (only in this case) her emotions were not as they were. She seemed not to have all emotions register quite fully, so as I kissed her goodbye she didn't cry or look upset but said goodbye and that she loved me. I managed to keep it together as I locked up and stood outside in the rain waiting for the cab...which was 25 minutes late... Needless to say, this gave me plenty of time to imagine all the things I may have forgotten to do for mum, or things I should have said.
However, when the cab finally arrived, I was soaked through and kept saying to myself, "just get through the flight. You can break down when you're across the Atlantic."